i'm the biggest Lindsay Lohan fan next to her mom
Got her posters on my wall, think about her all of the time
It's like i wake up in the morning wood in my bed
Roll over half praying its her sayin "wake up sleepy head"
It never is though, ok mom i'm getting up
oh mom! can i have my OJ in my Hilary Duff cup?
Grab a shirt out the drawer, a pair a pants from the floor
A song in my heart thumping for all the girls i adore
Mi amor es las chicas mas mas menor
I got my seventeen subscription so i know what's in store
it's on my bathroom floor, next to YM and Stuff
one day i'll get playboy and wait for Hilary duffs muff
But that's a few days away, more like 400 and change
Still not getting it, maybe this will help me explain
i love Amanda Bynes, i wanna FTS her boobs
So many young cuties how's a boy to choose
So you're looking at me wondering what's wrong in my brain
A 21 year old milktoast-balding-pedo with pit stains
That's ok call me names, start with never been laid
saving up for Mary-Kate, Ashley and my wedding day
I know i haven't met em yet, but its destiny no doubt
all you fucking freshman at NYU best watch out
cuz i got the grades, and nailed my GRE
grad school, your cool, TA's gonna be me
maybe that won't work out, but Broadway's down the street
i'll pop in see Kim Possible as Belle in Beauty and the Beast
be like hey Christie, hey you miss me,
Come on out your dressing room baby kiss me
She'll be like oh hey, who the hell are you
"i know the Olsen twins" "oh not those two"
Yeah i had em, but i want the best
and miss Carlson Romano you've captured my interest
chances are Wren and i will eventually split
If you caught the double entendre i definitely intended it
But legs aside, we'll probably one day stop dating
And i'll go back to my constant masterplan which is waiting
for the right girl, which sadly, isn't Hilary duff
She's amazing, but 5'4' just ain't tall enough
and Lacey Chabert actually older than me
and no matter how hard i try i'm not hard for Avril Lavigne
The skater shit and ties make her look like a dude
oops, my mistake, Mandy Moore's hair style has got me confused
and Ashlee Simpson's voice on her sister's body'd make her a hottie
But that's living in dream world, sadly, reality's got me
i'm desperate but i'm not looking toward Raven Simone
unless we're talking Mr. Cooper or the Cosby show
sexy Alexa Vega caught my eye back in spy kids one
And watching her grow has well, made me come, undone
speaking but spies got room for Harriet in my life
Buffy Summers little sister Michelle T be my wife
Emma Watson's magic put love spell on me
sorry Harry Potter but Hermiony's mine you'll see
We're gonna do it on the broom, i'm gonna snitch ya snatch
back in Harry Potter one i put dibs on her ass
Anne Hathaway's my princess, hope she knights me
jet to Britain and EO Kiera Knightely nightly
I get sick when i think about these girls in a few years
Wrinkled 22 year olds, the answer is clear i'm not ready for a relationship, but have no fears
in 09 its sweet 18 for Jamie Lynn spears!