Well I'm here with a new proclamation
To rid the world of evil and super spies
A new hero for an apathetic nation
Like a Tranformer, more to me than meets the eye
But sometimes I do fear I'm under-qualified
I don't have powers, no x-ray sight
I don't have wings and I'm afraid of heights
I once tried on a ferris wheel in New York
I thought I'd maybe die
I'm not that strong, I don't lift cars
I've got no job, but I've got a big heart
Sometimes when I think I've been shot at
I wet myself and cry
Once caught four albino doughnut robbers
Twice covered in grease by a chick named Duchess Fries
Three times I was knocked out by a mango from Kid Atilla
Man, I really hate that guy
But like my girl always says
What can the world expect?
You only doing your best
But still I feel less
I don't have powers, no x-ray sight
I don't have wings and I'm afraid of heights
I once tried on a ferris wheel in New York
I thought I'd maybe die
I'm not that strong, I don't lift cars
I've got no job, but I've got a big heart
Sometimes when I think I've been shot at
I wet myself and cry
And when it comes, my final gasp
I'm hoping that my name will last
As a hero who stood up against the bad
Never turned his back
But never did, I run way
And never did I save the day
Cuz if asteroids hit and make hippos fly
I'm not your guy
I don't have powers, no x-ray sight
I don't have wings cuz I'm afraid of heights
I once tried on a ferris wheel in New York
I thought I'd maybe die
I'm not that strong, I don't lift cars
I've got no job, but I've got a big heart
And that counts much more than a square jaw
So tell your friends, with my weak chin,
I'm here to win
Tell everyone I've arrived
