rap geek humour humor nerdcore Night of the Living Christ by Schaffer the Darklord from album Mark of the Beast
Duration : 4 minutes & 34 seconds.
Listener : 4695 peoples.
Played : 18327 times and counting.
Some say the savior first lived during 30 years or so
Between BC and AD 2000 years ago
A man of myth and legend and stories
Maybe you've heard of him
He was a Jewish Carpenter and his mother was a virgin
His name was The Christ and some thought him odd
Because he preached in the streets and claimed to be the son of God
Performing miracles a little to win over the Romans
Infuriated by his acts they called him a showman
So they tackled him and shackled him and whipped him and beat him and tortured him
They did everything just short of believe him
They nailed to a cross and left him in the sun to die
Now here's where the story varies in everybodies eyes
(You can believe)
That on the day he met his fate, or
(You can believe)
He came back three days later
(You can believe)
That he shall return again to commence the Armageddon and the judgment of men.
He wont descend from the Heavens
He'll emerge from the earth
With worms in his eyes
His blood dry as dirt
All bones with little chunks of mummified flesh
Even the bugs in his bowels will be repulsed by the stench
Hungry as hell not eaten in two millennium
And he'll immediately need to start feeding some
He will search for the first church as down come the rains
Moaning Aramaic with a craving for brains
Half eaten believers scream \"Jesus of Nazareth\"
Their dead bodies rise back to life like Lazarus
This horror story will be in the new Bible
Written by zombies Jesus' newest disciples
Satan won't arrive for the end times war.
And Christ will hunt a hundred and then be hungry for more
No rifle no reason to deliver us from evil
The undead prince of peace is feeding on his people.
(Chorus)
And he shall rise rise
The son of God will arrive
Back from the dead
And when it happens it'll blacken the skies
And he shall rise rise
And we'll all be surprised
As he walks the earth to the cries of \"He's Alive\"
Now wait wait what would Jesus do?
Well let me tell you what he'll do
He will leave a trail of goo
As he prays, he preys on you
Undead messiah with the entire world turning in to
Zombies like him
You'll die for him
Because he died for you
(Oh Jesus Christ! It's Jesus Christ!)
For centuries men of cloth have warned that this day will come
And they've used it to keep people oppressed under their moral thumb
They've controlled and convinced us that our lives are filled with sin
Well guess what? That's who he's coming for, those who think they're pure like him
He will only go after those who in him have faith
So all non-believers around the world will be safe
All the Muslims and Buddhists the satanists the atheists
The Jews will be safe too, but not the Jews for Jesus
And not the hypocrites or pro-life sexists
Who hide in the religious right in the heart of Texas
Most of our government will get it the same
And anyone who has committed atrocities in his name
He'll crucify Klansmen, That'll be beautiful
Then he'll get that fucking prick who pickets gay funerals
Captive pedophiles are eaten after he whips 'em
LOOK OUT! Cause he'll send you back to Hell Mel Gibson
Those old and grand crusades who enforce
Christian prayer in our schools and commandments in courts
All of his followers who twist the words that he said
Are the ones he'll hunt when he comes back from the dead.
(Chorus)
And he shall rise rise
The son of God will arrive
Back from the dead
And when it happens it'll blacken the skies
And he shall rise rise
And we'll all be surprised
As he walks the earth to the cries of \"He's Alive\"
Now wait wait what would Jesus do?
Well let me tell you what he'll do
He will leave a trail of goo
As he prays, he preys on you
Undead messiah with the entire world turning in to
Zombies like him
You'll die for him
Because he died for you
(He's coming, he's coming, but he's coming to eat us)
Christians will all turn to zombies upon his return visit
It isn't too much different than it is now is it?
(Chorus)
And he shall rise rise
The son of God will arrive
Back from the dead
And when it happens it'll blacken the skies
And he shall rise rise
And we'll all be surprised
