It was a beautiful day and everyone was excited
There was a picnic and the whole Nintendo crew was invited!
Luigi stood up and said:
Listen everyone, I love you guys! You are my best friends in the world!
You make me glad to be alive!
Excuse me, hi there I'm the announcer for a fun new family game!
It's called Super Smash Brothers!
That sounds nice, how do we play?
Well, first I'm going to warp you into a world of hate and war,
Where you'll assault everyone you have ever known and loved before!
I don't think I wanna do that...
Oh, come on, it'll be a bash!
Now grab all of your little friends 'cause it is time for us to motherfucking smash!
Whoa!
Wait, no!
Let's go! Kick the shit out of your friends!
That's not cool.
Have a blast as you beat their ass,
And then they're forced to clap for you at the end!
3, 2, 1, smash!
Mario!
Hey Bro-agh!
Your chode has been destroyed 200%
I needed that chode!
Can't we all just get along?
Abso-fucking-lutely not, you gotta smash!
The park was destroyed, hundreds of bystanders dead,
Kirby held Donkey Kong captive in his huge, disgusting head!
Fox said:
Hey Mario, stop crying, just sack up and fight instead!
I'm Luigi, all these bloodstains make my overalls look red!
Sonic looked tough 'til Link kicked him in the stuff,
The madness of cold-blooded murder had overtaken Jigglypuff!
He blasted Bowser to infinity with one massive-ass hit
Then he took three Falcon Punches like it wasn't even shit!
Is the time almost over? I can't tell, my face is mashed..
Don't worry, Luigi, the clock says 4, 3, 2
Oh no...
1, smash!
Whoa!
This blows...
You know when Mario and Peach team up you are screwed
You're my own brother!
Pikachu's way less fucking cute when he is trying to electrocute you!
Pika-pi!
Samus!
What do you want?
Is pissed, you got a small amount of dirt on her suit!
Oh, you're dead, bitch!
That is the last god damn straw!
Oh shit, I think Luigi's gonna fucking smash!
Hey, look at me now!
I'm beating my friends!
I have no regrets,
This is the fucking best!
Yes, I can see now,
We're having fun in the end,
Now it all makes sense!
I guess just because we smash each other, doesn't mean we're not brothers.
Ahh, Mario, you suck!
Bite me!
