"People of New York! For quite some time now, I've silently observed you carrying on with your silly, meaningless little lives. Well, tonight, it will be my pleasure to liberate you from them. At midnight, I will destroy this city you call home with every last one of you in it. You can scream all you want, but I assure you, there's nowhere to run. There's a new menace in town, and it is me. Where are you heroes now?"
So we meet again, my noble heroic friend
Our feud has brewed forever, but tonight it will end
And then there will be nothing left of you but a memory
My old foe, arch-rival, nemesis and my enemy
You see, my granddad invented trying lasses
To train tracks cackling twisting his moustache and
My dad, his spawn, carried it on
In the 60's holding hostages with atomic bombs
I come from a long line of this kind of people
You see, I represent a third generation of evil
It courses through my blood, this love of chaos and killing
So much more than just a criminal, I'm a supervillain!
In a mask with black gloves pulled up past
My elbows, "Hell No!" I bellow with both fists clasped
A mass of wild hair that's red or orange or green
And a single silver streak, I look horribly mean
I've got an army of weapons and robots and goons
And a gold membership into the Legion of Doom
Beyond the doors of my fortress it's pouring down rain
I'm no madman, man, no, I'm fucking insane!
My satellites' sights aimed on strategic sites
Laser beams'll vaporize this city tonight.
I had to pull a diamond heist to buy my doomsday device
It will turn the earth to ice. Yeah...it's pretty nice.
Send out your signal, call in your hero
I kidnapped his lady, now his power's are zero
I'll give him ultimatums, yeah I'll drop them like pearls
"You can choose one, hero: the world or the girl."
The Joker, Lex Luthor, Two-Face and Bizarro
Doc Ock, Juggernaut, Ming and Magneto
Green Goblin, Penguin, Venom, Electro
Megatron, Cobra Commander and Destro
(CHORUS):
I root for the bad guys!
With the evil eyes fists in the sky they're screaming "Die die die!" And I
Root for the bad guys!
The sick and the twisted, so sadistic and wicked, that's why I
Root for the bad guys!
The psychopathic maniacs the black hat sort, I
Root for the bad guys!
Chilling like a supervillain killing for sport
"Now, Mr. Freeze!"
Now superheroes are bigger and stronger although
Villains do triple their sales in action figures alone
Heroes have hearts, we control minds
They get the good press, we get the good lines
We say things like "Rue the day!"
And "For this, the people of this little city shall pay!"
And "Now I will show you absolute fear."
And "Well, well, well...what do we have here?"
Hey Mr. Hero, why the cape and the half-mask?
Your costume looks stupid, mine's fucking bad ass!
Now buzz off, you've a city to save
While I'll be back at my lair giggling, digging your grave
To me your identity is no secret
I know the story of your origin and I know your weakness
Carry on with absurd monologue, you silly bastard
I won't hear a word over my own demonic laughter
Heroes play supporting roles, the villain's the star
With my half-British accent rolling my "r's"
Rrrrrrrrolling in my getaway car
Go ahead and try to chase me but you won't getting far
My cold, black heart starts pumping endorphins
Every time I leave a bomb in a bus full of orphans
With the doors sealed shut, breaks cut and it's racing
Toward the edge of a cliff, shit, you better go and save 'em!
Walk into a trap, gassed, passed out now it's dark
Wake up in chains over a tank full of sharks
I'm sure you'll get free, you always do when the time comes
Even I've escaped a dozen times from the asylum
I got the DA, commissioner and the mayor
Tied up to a bomb, and in my palm I hold the detonator
All along this was my plan
Now I will give you the count of 10 to meet my demands
"10...9...8...7...6…5, ah fuck it."
Skeletor, Catwoman and Dr. Doom
Doomsday, Kingpin and Ra's Al Gul
Shredder, Sandman, Darth Vader, Scarecrow
Brainiac, Mr. Mxyzptlk and Mysterio
(CHORUS)
When the smoke clears, and I see the light
I'm surrounded by four walls, padded and white
In a straightjacket, dammit, this isn't the end
Curses, superhero, we shall meet again!
"Mwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
