Saludos, my darlings
And you know who you are
Come on, let's mingle
So nice to see you
Throw your hips into the air
Like Cyd Charisse and Fred Astaire
Let's crazy go nuts
Just looking into your eyes, darling
I can tell that you have
The legs of a dancer
So bring those legs and the
Rest of your body over here
And be Fernando's private prancer
Darling, I got to tell you something
And I don't say this to everybody
You look marvelous
Absolutely marvelous
You know, my dear
My father used to say to me
Nando, don't be a schnook
It's not how you feel
It's how you look
He was marvelous but you, darling
You look marvelous
Absolutely marvelous
And this is from my heart
Which is deep inside my body
It is better to look good
Than to feel good
Get down (that's right)
(Fernando) darlings
(Who's marvelous) try me
(Cyndi Lauper) marvelous
(Tina Turner) still marvelous
(Jayne Meadows) she's marvelous
(Grace Jones) humongous
(Cher) marvelous
(Chaka Khan) marvelous
(Vanity) marvelous
(Appolonia) ditto
(Madonna) her belly button
Is absolutely marvelous
I'm about to lose control
And I think I like it
Oh, look, there's Sting
Looking for his last name in the dip
I am what love is all about
I've got American teeth
And a Spanish mouth
Please, hold me
While I tango
So, my dear, it's been a blast
You were not my first
You won't be my last
Ciao, I got to mambo
Nothing lasts forever, darling
But it's not the end of the world
When I was fired by Paramount
They were still MGM
I love you young people today
With your rock and roll
Like an Eddie Van Heflin
(Van Halen) whatever
When I look into your eyes, darling
I see the reflection of me
Look at me dancing around in there
I look marvelous
Absolutely marvelous
You know, darling, I love dancing
Dancing to me is like
Standing still, only faster
Do you know what I'm saying to you
My dear, do you understand
The term, full grown midget
Must be me
There are eight million stories
In the naked city, darling
Let's be two of them
I'm kidding you, I'm a kidder
Let's you and I go back
To my private hideaway
Put on some soft music
I'll put on my Spiderman pajamas
And we'll do things I'm gonna
Tell my friends we did anyway
Darling, I'm worried about
The Cabbage Patch Kids
I mean, when they grow up
Will they be confused that these
People are not their real parents
You know, I went to a Madonna concert
And the people come dressed like her
With the navel showing and the brassiere
And the ties with the pantyhose
And the beauty mark
And these were some of the guys
I tell you, this rock and roll
Is really nuts
If a train is leaving Chicago
At eleven A.M. in the morning
With five thousand pounds of bluefish
And another train is leaving Phoenix
At exactly the same time and
Bert Convy is still hosting Tattle Tales...
